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By gonz in Comedy, nonsense

If you’re like me, you have friends who watch “The Daily Show” and “The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central. Did you know that Comedy Central and those aforementioned shows are the property of Viacom — one of the ten biggest media monopolies in the country? And did you further know that Viacom has removed all “Daily Show” and “Colbert Report” content from Hulu.com? And that they’ll sue your puny ass for copyright infringement if you so much as post one frame of video?

Fun, huh?

Honestly, what crawled up Sumner Redstone’s ass here? There’s a demented stripe of megalomania at work here to think that fan pages can and will hurt Viacom’s bottom line. Granted, they’ve got their fingers in a lot of pies (radio, TV, movies, books, etc.) and there are a lot of mouths to feed but… come on!

I’ve often wondered about the logic behind corporations getting free word of mouth marketing via fansites. FREE. Word of mouth is the best marketing there is because there’s a zero sum investment on the part of the corporation.

It’s fine if they’d prefer to shoot themselves in the foot on this one. Personally, I can only stomach so much of Jon Stewart’s reliance on dick & fart jokes — which is a shame for such an intelligent, satirical mind — and Colbert’s smarmy O’Reilly put-on.

Their loss.

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By gonz in A Bit of Politics, Uncategorized

"Arms for hostages? Ha! Over my dead body."

I have to admit, I don’t understand the Right’s fascination with brainless cream puffs. Whether it’s Sarah Palin winking and reading crib notes off of her hand or the whole thought-free network known as FOX “News” or just plain ol’ Bobby Jindal giving his Mr. Rogers impersonation another go around, it seems that they believe more in ciphers & talking points than, dunno, actually doing constructive things.

The latest example of needless legislation is the proposal put up by some waggishly coy Republican to slap Ronald Reagan’s face on the fifty dollar bill. Ulysses S. Grant, move over and let Ronnie take over.

The Right has never been shy of their love for Grampa Caligula nor have they been able to move past January 20th, 1989. Sure, there was the whole Contract On With America but we all know that was just reheated Reagan booty sweat. Let’s face it, they just can’t quit him and if they had the power of sorcery they would surely raise him from the dead.

But let’s face it, there are enough things with Reagan’s moniker on it — an airport, a museum, even a stretch of highway in Southwestern Ohio, even though the only connection between him and the Buckeye state were the number of its citizens who ended up on the unemployment line. So it doesn’t surprise me that the Republicans are again dry humping to make sure we remember what a great and awesome president he really wasn’t.

Today, the $50 bill. Tomorrow, Mount Rushmore. Next week, the surface of the moon.

Then again, it’s not as if most Republican supporters will ever see $50 in their lifetime.

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By gonz in A Bit of Politics

There are times when I possess the temperament of the rebel. It is at these times that I am prone to jumping on tables at my local establishment and rail upon the wooden soapbox. Likewise, I’m liable to jump on this particular forum here and proselytize on and on.

Tonight will be such a night.

I point you, my dear and loyal readers, to this short article from Adbusters.org. I am of the opinion that we spend quite a lot of time tethered to electronic leashes. Yes, I’m talking about My Face and Twits and all manner of “connectivity” software and gadgets we feel we need to feel like natural, human beens. You’re not obligated to click on the links to suicidemachine.org or Seppukoo.com. In fact, it’s more liberating to do it yourself, without the bringing in of a middle man or third party. I mean, have some balls, ferchrissake!

Secondly, you might have noticed the little graphic to the right for Move To Amend’s We The Corporation. I encourage you to read up and sign the motion.

Thirdly, do become a subscriber to Adbusters. It’s a nifty little machine informed by the need to free us from our pesky consumerist ways.

All of these little suggestions are a means of teaching ourselves to think independently. Sure, I fall into the trap quite a bit. When I drag myself out I’m raging with the zeal of the convert. However, thinking is a fragile yet no less valued commodity. Think. Think. Think!

Let’s close with the customary George Carlin clip highlighting just why this country is so fucked up.

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By gonz in Uncategorized, boredom

Current view from Asylum windows.

If you’re a media-addled somesuch, you’ll know that a goodly portion of the nation is under a blanket of snow, a quilt of ice, a throw of precipitation, and a fitted sheet of frost. Where the old Asylum resides is no different. The yetis are running wild in the woods behind us, our favorite sled has been careening the hills and valleys, and we’ve broken one or two shovels.

An Eskimo actually stopped by the other day on a bicycle and asked if he could use the bathroom.

What’s better than spending a day in the snow followed by an evening in front of the fireplace being loving attended to by Nurse Lenia. A fuck-off huge meal, that’s what.

It’s my hope that where ever you are, you are enjoying the weather and have warmth, food, and close companionship.

The bookstore where I work is finally open full-time. Although the snow slightly dampened our opening, the crowds have been hearty & healthy. Naturally, I am a constant danger to my bank account with my near daily purchases but I’m hoping that will eventually taper off and I can enjoy the rest of my career as a pauper/bookseller.

….

Finally, it’s true – stupidity is bad for your health.

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By gonz in food

Many an American’s Burns supper were ruined last week due to the continued import ban on haggis. This Scots delicacy is made with sheep pluck (hearts, lungs, and liver), oats, onions, shoe boxes, gravel, toenail clippings,and salt. As my personal rabbi adviser would say, good eatin’. “Delicacy” in gaelic must not mean what it does in the rest of the gourmand universe.

Again, the US keeps us safe from potentially lethal enemy combatants.

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By gonz in bad taste, movies

By now, you’ve seen the countless YouTube videos featuring Hitler raging over a seemingly miscellaneous circumstance. The clip used is from the German movie, Der Untergang (that’s Downfall, for you English types), and the humor inherent is from the incongruous system. My personal favorite is the one that followed the Columbus Blue Jackets at Washington Capitals tilt that had the Jackets’ rookie goaltender Steve Mason shutting out Alex Ovechkin & crew 3-0.

The first time I saw that clip, I laughed mightily. And I’m sure the first time you saw that clip, you laughed heartily. But as with most things on the Internet, the joke was repeated and repeated and, as Johnny Lydon would say, ad nauseum ad infinitum. Once is funny, twice is silly, fifty-seventh is frikkin’ annoying.

Someone wants to put a stop to all of that. Using another clip from the same movie, we get this none too subtle response to the numerous parody videos:

I wonder how many parodies this one is going to garner.

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C’est Une Film

01/28/2010
By gonz in movies

From the Flotsam & Jetsam Files…

Not long ago, I mentioned my discovery of a French mystery novel titled after this very website. The author had taken title as a play on Serge Gainsbourg’s song, “Lunatic Asylum”.

In a related story, a biopic of Gainsbourg’s life has been released en France.

That is all.

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